Who Me? Homeschool??

I never thought in a million years that we’d be a homeschooling family, let alone that I’d be a Director for this awesome program!  I wanted to share my journey on how God led us to this exciting adventure and hope that it encourages those who may be considering homeschooling too!

It was NEVER on my radar to home-school. N-E-V-E-R!!!  I was the typical person who thought homeschooling was weird. Besides, I thought, “what qualifies me to be a teacher?”  Sure, I have a degree, but being a certified teacher is a entirely different story.

So, how did homeschooling get on my radar? Simply put... God broke my heart. 
As my oldest child began reaching the school age years, something in me just wanted more!  I don’t know why, other than God just put that desire in me. So, I decided to do a little research. I consumed just about every homeschooling book I could, I read blogs, went to conferences and picked the brain of many homeschooling mothers. The more I learned, the more God began to challenge every preconceived notion I had about homeschooling. 


Through my research, it was easy to see the educational and siritual benefits to homeschooling, but there were still a few hang-ups I had. The first I have already mentioned above and that is...

1.    What qualifies me to be a teacher and educator for my child?


And the second was…..


2.    How would Homeschooling allow us to Live on Mission? How could we effectively share our lives and tell people about Jesus if our children were not in a “public” setting?
As my husband and I began to ask God these questions, it became very clear for us where He was leading our family.

1.   What qualifies me to be a teacher and educator for my children?
To my surprise, this question was rather easy for me to work through. Becoming a mom has made me more in tune with the "others" in my life. As moms, God has given us the ability to know what is best for our children. From the moment I knew I had conceived, I have been making decisions for my children and providing for all of their spiritual, emotional and physical needs. So, I guess it was a natural progression for me to begin thinking about their intellectual needs as well. Why couldn't I take care of their intellectual needs too? Their well being in "every" area of life is my responsibility.  


I am convinced that no one is going to care for and love my children more than me. No one will care more about their success and their well being than their own mother. Plain and simple. Aside from God, I am and will always be their biggest fan! 


Therefore, I AM qualified. I certainly do realize my own limitations, but you better believe if there was a subject I couldn’t teach, I would do everything in my power to get them the help, class, teacher, and etc…they need just as I would anything else. That being said, I am also realizing the importance of being a lifetime learner and staying ahead of my pupils. This excites me! I have the opportunity to take advantage of things that I was just too busy or uninterested in before. 


I am also discovering how far homeschooling has come and the amazing community of families that resource and network together. Not to mention, God led us to a national homeschooling group whose founder, Leigh Bortins was an aerospace engineer!  She is passionate about equipping parents all over the country on how to be home educators, but more on that in a later post. ; )  


All of this, coupled with a faith that God prepares those who are called, helps me to have faith in knowing He will prepare me for the tasks ahead, just as He always has.

2.    How would Homeschooling allow us to Living on Mission
My husband and I try to actively live our lives on mission. Sharing our lives, building relationships and hopefully building bridges back to the local church.  We love to “fish” and want to share this same conviction and passion with our children.


Living on mission is something we are VERY passionate about, but how would homeschooling allow us to live out this conviction? In the beginning, I had a hard time reconciling how we could effectively live on mission if we were not allowing our children to be among those who are lost and don’t know Jesus.   


Living on mission is not defined by a specific place, but rather how we live each and every moment of our lives. We live on mission with our families, our friends, at gymnastics, at baseball practice, at the gym, at the check out line, in the parking lot, taking a walk around the neighborhood just so you can meet your neighbors, being keenly aware of the lost and hurting right around you and then responding to their needs, and etc…It’s not about a specific setting like a school. It is your lifestyle! I want to teach my children to have this “other” centered lifestyle everyday regardless of where they are.  


Tim and I firmly believe and see our children as little disciples in training.  Just as an athlete trains everyday for a race, our children are also in training.  An athlete has no idea what it’s like to compete until he actually gets out there and does it.  With that being said, he doesn’t jump out onto the field without training before the big day. No, he must first spend time practicing, drilling, exercising, studying, and etc... 

My kids are learning about Jesus. They are disciples in training. They are learning “about” Jesus but they don’t “know”, “know”, “know” Him just yet. They have head knowledge about God, but haven’t yet had the heart experience. 


They need both. Without this, how can I expect them to properly take a stand against sin when it presents itself? How can I send them to a battlefield when they haven’t fully learned how to put on the full armor of God yet?  


They need to have a proper knowledge and understanding that God is who He says He is.  As they begin to experience this truth for themselves, they will learn how to recognize His voice, see Him at work around them and discover His unique plan for their lives.  When they have truly experienced this, they will have the strength and more importantly the desire, to live out their faith in a world that blatantly sets itself up against the knowledge of God.


I’m not saying they will always make the right choices. While that might be my hope, I am not that naïve. As I began wrestling with God through these tough questions what convicted my heart the most is the process of building. Building a strong foundation takes time and it’s hard to build when outside influences are pulling for their attention all day, every day.  


Am I sheltering? No, I don’t believe that sheltering is the answer, rather it is being cautious and cognizant of the fallen world we live in.  Matthew 10:16 says, “See I am sending you like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.”


I love the way Dr.Voddie Baucham articulates this thought, “Our children will engage the culture. The only question is, will they do so as lambs going off to slaughter, or will they be sheep among wolves who are wise as serpents and innocent as doves?" (Matthew 10:16)


This is not a post to convince you to homeschool, although I hope it may have encouraged those who may be considering it. If you are indeed considering it, but still scared to let go, my encouragement to you would be to visit with other homeschooling moms, sit in on their homeschooling days, and keep reading anything and everything you can about homeschooling. 


Most importantly pray! And keep praying until God gives you peace one way or another. I wouldn’t say homeschooling is for everyone, but I do believe it should be seriously considered, researched and prayed about by everyone! ; )

Whoever said walking with Jesus was dull and boring!
Loving the journey!

Mel

Who Would have Thought?

Ever have those times when you look back on your life and think…man, how did I get here? 


As I look back over the years, I am discovering that many things I said I would NEVER do, somehow God has led me to do those very things! 


Here are a few things I never thought or said I’d NEVER do!

·    Work in the ministry
·    Have more than 2 children
·    Be a stay at home mom
·    Homeschool
·    Marry a minister


Guess you never say never! ; )  

Nothing looks like what I had envisioned and I’m loving it! Who would have ever thought I’d have 4 kids, be a stay at home mom and now a homeschooling director!!  Not me that’s for sure!  

I am so thankful that God knows the plans He has for me. Plans that are far better than any I could have laid out for myself.

In fact, I know for sure, if left up to me I would have made a complete mess out of things. In my next few posts, I want to take some time to reflect on what God has been working out in my heart and talk about the things that have me smiling and saying… “Who Would Have Thought?”  :) 

For now, here is an incredible video of one of my favorite speakers and local Houston area Pastor, Voddie Baucham reciting a very thought provoking poem entitled, “Put The Baby In The Beemer.”  Though I’ve never owned a Beemer and never really aspired to, the message behind it articulates with such veracity the “it’s all about me mentality” that plagues our culture. As I reflect, I see a woman who was once willing to place my family on the altar of my ego in order to satisfy those deepest desires that not even I knew were there. That is, until God got a hold of my heart and helped me to better understand the precious gift of family that he’s given me and most importantly the value of my role in my home.

Friendship for Grown-Ups

I am a huge Lisa Whelchel fan and have read just about every book she’s ever written. One of my new favorites is her latest book, Friendship for Grown Ups. In this book, Lisa explores the challenges of friendship; particularly women friendships.

Let’s face it…friendships can be challenging! Lisa speaks from her heart as she relays her own story of how God tore down the wall she had so carefully constructed around her heart in order to prevent people from getting too close; thereby exposing her own neediness and vulnerability.

“Vulnerability, trust and grace is not always easy to cultivate or maintain but isn’t that what we all want? To be seen, in all our glory, for better or worse, the good, the bad and the ugly and still be embraced? If only these kind of friendships were easy to find.”

As she begins the journey of discovering “real” friendship, the very thing she fears is that which God uses to chisel away at her heart. It is through the pain of broken trust and betrayal that God teaches her how to be real, needy and vulnerable in order to truly be a “real” friend…the kind of friend we all need.

I have not met many women in my Christian life who I can honestly say know the good, bad and ugly of Mel…and still embrace me. Perhaps they haven’t felt the same of me either. That really makes me sad. Don't get me wrong...I have some great friends that I love dearly and I know they care for me as well.

As I chewed on the quote above, there are only two women that come to mind, who have seen me and know the good, bad and the ugly of Mel. One was once my boss, and is now mentor and very dear, dear friend whom I will forever be grateful for. Sure, we have rubbed each other the wrong way before, but we know each other. She knows the Mel God created, has grace for the Mel that’s still in process and chooses to see ahead to the Mel God is creating me to be. That’s real friendship! That’s real grace!

The other is a girl I knew back in high school. Man, could we have some heated discussions, but our love and respect for one another went deeper. We might not have always seen eye to eye, but no matter what, there was a sisterly love for one another. Even today, though we might have different viewpoints, we can still respect one another despite our different perspectives and love one another through them. The best part is that though the years go by, we can pick up a conversation like it was just yesterday. She knows me. She knows the Mel God created and respects the Mel I desire to be. That’s real friendship!

Here is what I am wrestling with: Isn’t the church (not "A church" but "THE church" in general) the place where we should be experiencing more of these grace filled friendships and unconditional love? I just don’t understand how we can be the body of Christ and yet have so very little grace for God’s people. The very people in which God himself dwells! When I think about it like that, it just blows my mind and makes me cry out to God to help me show his child, my sister in the faith, more grace and love.

I am processing through all of this, but one thing I have discovered about myself in regards to friendship is that I tend to be an all or nothing kind of gal. There isn’t anything I don’t commit myself to without giving it my all. This is just the way God made me. The same goes with friendship. I am a loyal friend, which means there isn’t ANYTHING I wouldn’t do for you if I can; especially for a close friend.

Yet, what I have come to discover about myself, and this book only helped to further highlight, is that at times I can unintentionally expect the same things of my friends in return. The result is hurt feelings when expectations are not met. One of the biggest things my husband is holding me accountable to is not to infer the intentions or actions of other people. For example, I might say, “I can’t believe she said _______, I would have never said that to her” or “I can’t believe she didn’t _________ I would have done that for her.” Time and time again, my hubby will fire back with, “but she’s not YOU!!!” He says, “she is not going to do and say things just like you would. If it bothers you that much, ask her what she meant when she said, _______ but don’t infer. It leads you to a bad place.” Blah, Blah, Blah. The truth is, he’s right and I know it.

In Friendship for Grown Ups, Lisa Whelchel refers to this as helium balloons. Before you let the little balloon you’ve imagined float away, pop it by exposing it. Bring it to the light. Tell your friend, “I could be overly sensitive, but was I reading you the right way when you said __________?” Don’t just sweep it under the rug or worse yet, write someone off! I have been guilty of the latter. So needless to say, I have found so many nuggets of truth in this little 178 page book.

One of my favorite quotes that I have sadly found to be true is when she writes about our fear of being needy. Check this out:

“What has conditioned so many of us to be afraid to ask for help when we need it? Or to reach out for a touch when we are lonely? Or to forgo sharing a happy success for fear of sounding prideful? Why do we choose the safety of space in even the closest of friendships?"

As I reflected on this question (and have been guilty at some point of one or all of them), it really just blows my mind. I’m wondering… “Are we living in fear and lead by pride.” Fear and Pride…two painful enemies of the Christian life.

Afraid to ask for help….why? Because we won’t appear to have it all together; we won’t be the perfect mom who knows how to raise the perfect kids? Maybe it’s simply because we don’t want to bother already busy people and become a burden to them….we’re tough, self sufficient we can handle it…right?

Reach out when we’re lonely….why?? Isn’t that what the body of Christ is for??

Forgo sharing a happy success for fear of sounding prideful…why??? aren’t we called to rejoice with others?

Are we living in fear and lead by pride?

Henry Cloud writes…. “God made us to need Him and each other. We need God. We need his word. We need each other. The apostle John wrote, “I have much to write to you, but I do not want to use paper and ink. Instead, I hope to visit you and talk with you face to face, so that our joy may be complete.” 2 John 12. Friendships require vulnerability, grace and action. You can’t build a friendship off of self sufficiency. You must reach out to others and ask for help. Neither can you build a friendship if you never make time for others and concern yourself with their needs. We need community, we need each other. God knew that. That’s why he blessed us with the church body. So, why do we push this precious gift away?

These are just a few things I’m pondering lately and wrestling with in my heart. This was the first book I’ve read that spoke honestly and directly regarding these sensitive and almost taboo matters.

If you want a good book you can curl up with and hang out with a girl who’s keeping it real, check out Lisa’s book, Friendships for Grown Ups. I laughed, cried and cried some more as she relays the bitter sweetness of friendships and gives practical insight on how to choose and cultivate “safe” friendships filled with grace, so we His people, can truly reflect his love to one another.


If you’ve ever experienced the pain of friendship or would simply like to know how to be a better friend, this book is a must read.

It's been a while...

Hey Friends and Family! We’re back!

Life has definitely brought about a lot of surprises and changes including a new addition to the family, homeschooling, a new job, church, and new home.

Though this transition has been LONG and challenging, it has also been such a blessing as we have seen God at work in so many ways. After 10.5 long months of home showings, we’re finally on the other side. Whew!! It’s time now to get settled in and figure out our new normal…whatever that looks like!

Though we have most of the inside boxes tackled, we still have a mountain of boxes to sift through in the garage as this is the place where everything got dumped! L I’m choosing to look at the brighter side--we’re finally able to “move about the cabin!” No more bumping into boxes! Yea!! That’s not to say I still don’t hear someone yelling out, “mom, where is ________?” However, that’s more because mommy’s still trying to figure out the best places for everything to “live”—as my eldest would say.

It feels like we are moving at a snails pace (and we are),but hey with four little ones to attend to, this has been a major accomplishment for us. As much as I’ve wanted to get everything in order as quickly as possible, there are 4 little people who need their mommy and daddy. Life still goes on. Laundry still needs to be done, dishes washed, bodies bathed, dinners made, drinks to fill, babies to nap, and etc….So, needless to say, this is yet another way God is teaching me how to be flexible; a theme that has been reoccurring for the past 2.5 years of my life (Thanks Dale Carnegie)!

As I reflected a bit on this, I couldn’t help but think of my kiddos who have been alongside us during one of the most challenging seasons of our married lives. They have without a doubt been a living-breathing example of what it means to be flexible. What an encouragement they have been to me as I have watched them let go of the only home they’ve ever known. Not once have they complained. This is no stretch of the imagination. In fact, even though my 2yr old is unable to fully communicate, the first night in our new home when I announced that it was bed time, he picked up his monkey, looked at me and said, “alright mom” and then went straight to his new room! I couldn’t believe it! What a blessing that was as we were so physically and emotionally spent and desperately in need of some rest.

It’s funny, I kept waiting, trying to be ready with an encouraging word to offer or to wipe a teary eyed face. That’s not to say they don’t love and miss all their amazing little friends. No way! They simply said their goodbyes and trusted Mom and Dad’s word that there would be new friends to make and a new home that Jesus was bringing us to. Wouldn’t life be so much easier if we came to our heavenly Father as simply and as orderly as that? No tantrums, no looking back, just moving forward and trusting that God is doing a new thing, even if we don’t have all the why’s and how’s answered.

Time and time again, Isaiah 43: 18-19 has been an encouraging verse through challenging seasons in my life. And even now, as we continue to trust and let go I have found it especially encouraging in this season.

Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See , I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland. Isaiah 43: 18-19.

That’s not to say out with the old and in with the new. Please don’t hear that. Like our kiddos, we too will carry these friendships in our hearts forever. You have been in our homes, eaten dinner with us, brought meals over, watched our kids, went on double dates together, celebrated births and walked with us in challenging seasons. You have been a blessing to us in so many ways and we are so thankful for the time we had together. We treasure the friends we’ve had to say goodbye to and know that no matter where God plants us, God has and will always bind our hearts together through Christ Jesus.

Yet, as we embrace what God is doing in this new season (challenges and all) we are experiencing the joy of seeing God’s provision and seeing how he has been at work even though we couldn’t see or understand it all. No matter how uncomfortable it is, there is a freedom that comes in knowing you’re in the middle of God’s will that gives you the hope and strength to persevere.

Even though we’re not through it all, we have not only seen the way he has provided for us physically (ask me about how we found our house), but he’s also been plowing through the muddy fields of our hearts. While not always pleasant, it is here God can shape, mold and refine us. Don’t know what all that looks like yet, but I have hope in what’s yet to come! J

Genesis 50:20-21 ….., but God intended it for Good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. So then don’t be afraid. I will provide for you and your children. And he reassured them and spoke kindly to them.

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions....What's Baby Boy's Name??

So, we're a few weeks away until our expected due date, March 17th and we've yet to finalize baby boy's name! It's driving me crazy! I don't know why but Tim and I are having a hard time landing together on that one special name that you just know that's it...that's the name!

You'd think by now I'd be use to it....

From Noah to Isabella
Because we did not find out the sex of our first child, we went to the hospital prepared with a boy name and was 99% sure of our girl name. Noah for a boy and Isabella for a girl. The catch was was that we had already been calling the baby Noah without even knowing the sex. In fact, I grew so attached to what I thought was "baby Noah" that Tim and I seriously contemplated calling the baby Noa even if it was a girl (BTW--there is a girl in the bible named Noah). Right after the baby was born and they told us it was a girl, I remember Tim whispering in my ear, "so, what do you think..Noa or Isabella?" I gave him the honor of deciding and of course now I couldn't see it any other way! I'm so glad he picked Isabella!

Elianna
We decided on Elianna's name a month before she was born. I had been agonizing over a name (much like I am doing now) when Tim came home one night and said, "you have to listen to this new Christy Nockels song...I think I found our girl name."

Being that Christy Nockels is my favorite Christian aritist and curious about what on earth he was talking about, I immediately told him to pop in the CD and play it for me. I loved the song and when I heard the name I knew that was it! That was our name! So, that's how we got the name Elianna.

Baby Boy
So here I am. Same story different baby. We do have a few top picks (Noah still being one of them) but we've yet to reach that sold out, "that's it" feeling! If you're wondering what's different about baby number 3...why don't you go with Noah like you originally planned on doing when you were pregnant with baby number 1? The answer is we definitely haven't ruled it out. It's still one of our top picks, but something is definitely different about the name this time around. I'm not sure if it has something to do with how attached I got with with thinking it was a boy the first time around, calling it by that name for so long and then finding out that there never really was a Noah. Sounds crazy I know, but I really can't explain why I'm not hands down, sold out, gotta have that name this time around?

I don't know...maybe it's not as practical as I thought for two people to reach the same sold out feeling on a name.

What do you think? What's been your experience here?

When I think about any major life decision we've ever made, we've always been so "here." To me, choosing our child's name fits in that category! Just feels weird not be on the same page and time is ticking!!

(check out my baby spinning like crazy in the count down box...feels like he's spinning franticly over there for a name!)

*****Addition to this post*****
Tim and I are reading and discussing names right now...and this is what we came across. Pretty ironic and funny.

	What is johnny cash's middle name?

R.

Johhny Cash was born J. R. Cash (his parents couldn't agree on a name, just initials), taking the name John R. Cash when he entered the military, and then Johnny Cash when he took to the stage. Note that his father was "Ray" and his mother's maiden name was "Rivers," so the "R" probably stood for one (or more likely, both) of these names.

10 Random Things About Me....

1. I carry Purell with me just about everywhere I go….you never know when you’ll need it especially in public bathrooms…yuk!

2. I love storage containers, bins, crates, etc…and love buying cool organizational bins whenever I see them! I love to have them on hand ready to go when needed!

3. I love shoes…from flip flops to pumps; sassy, clunky, fun, etc…I’ve got em!

4. My favorite snack is popcorn

5. I love curling up in my bed and watching “Friends” with my husband

6. I still love putting chips in my sandwich

7. I am the Queen of Laundry—oops...I mean of mildew! I passionately hate doing laundry and when I do, I always forget to switch the clothes in time!

8. I love Jane Eyre but have never finished it---I am an avid reader but always seem to get distracted by the next new book out. I tell myself every year I’m going to finish it…maybe this year is the year!

9. One of my biggest fears is someone getting their fingers or toes smashed in a car door or any door for that matter (I have a terrible memory in particular when I saw this happen to my husband). I am very paranoid about this; especially since my small children are in the stage where they are fascinated about opening and closing doors.

10. I use to have a nose piercing

Life Coaching

I have a life coach! It has been so refreshing to share my personal goals, struggles and spiritual journey with someone who can both support, challenge and help hold me accountable to my personal life goals in relation to the vision and calling God has given me.

For me personally, my life coach, Kathryn Bonner, is a godly Christian woman that has been a cheerleader in my spiritual journey. We have a half hour session once a week via phone. This week my homework assignment is to journal the negative thought processes that invade my heart and mind causing me to live and respond in fear rather than walking in the full armor of the Lord.

People have physical trainers to help them keep their bodies fit...why not have a life coach help you get from where you are to where you want to be! Visit The Today Show for More information.